I Don't Care

Heretic. Blasphemer. Subversive. Deserter. Turncoat. Commie. I have been called all these things, and worse besides. But I'm a creampuff, really. What could possibly make otherwise sober and level-headed citizens revile me so?
   I don't care about the SuperBowl.
   Yup. Couldn't give a rat's ass. Means as much to me as World Cup soccer, and I don't even know when that is. And I don't mean this particular SuperBowl, I mean all SuperBowls, across all time. It's one of those things that's hyped beyond all reason, pumped up in such an overbearing and grandiose fashion that it couldn't possibly live up to the expectations. And it doesn't. Falls flat.
   'Oooh, but you'll miss the SuperBowl ads,' you say. And I say 'no, I won't.' If I wanted to see them I could watch them on YouTube, but I don't give a rat's ass about that either.
   Don't get me wrong, I'm not an elitist, I haven't turned my TV to PBS and unplugged it. I watch a lot of bad TV, I revel in it, and lately I have watched some football. For God's sake, I watch NASCAR relgiously so I'm not exactly highbrow. I'm just tired of overblown, over-hyped crap that I'm supposed to like if I was in any way a good American. Enough already.

Here's a short list of other crap people seem to think matters that I also don't care about. This is just a sample, the entire list is far too long to share.
   Grammys
   Lost
   Twitter
   Lady Gaga
   Seinfeld - a blast from the past, but it's still a horrible show
   YouTube
   American Idol
   Trans Fats
   Winter Olympics - when somebody non-white wins something let me know

p.s. Yes, I do know the SuperBowl is next weekend. That's how much I don't care about it, I'm letting you know well beforehand.