Big Girl In The Crosswalk

So I was driving home from class last night, top down, enjoying the night air. I came to a stop light at two very wide streets (Colorado and Figueroa, for those truly interested). It was night, and there were very few cars on the road.
   Empty as the streets were, however, a car came screaming up in the lane next to me, going too fast then laying heavy on the brakes. It was one of those awful little Scion things, ugly as a bar of homemade soap with the bass a-thumpin' and the driver leaning waaaaay back in his seat. Living the stereotype.
   The light on Colorado changed and I saw a big girl start to cross the street, taking her in front of my car and the backwards-hat-wearing junior douchebag next to me. When I say big girl, I mean BIG GIRL, not someone who could stand to 'lose a few pounds,' this was a girl who could lose an entire person's worth of weight and still be very, very fat. She was moving as fast as she could, which is to say not fast at all, and Figueroa is a lot of street to cross in not a lot of time.
   I could see that she wasn't going to clear the intersection before the light changed, and I just knew the idiot in the Scion was going to either run her down or do or say something horrible to her.
   Sure enough, the light changed just as the big girl was in front of the Scion, and the guy inside laid on the horn. The big girl slammed her hands on the hood and started yelling back at him. It was going to get ugly, and I was a witness.
   Then... they started laughing. The big girl and the jerkoff in the Scion knew each other. Curtis and Jen, who hadn't seen each other in months, I was helpless to overhear as they loudly reconnected in the middle of the street. As I drove away I saw big girl go around to the passenger side and get in.
   This kind of thing happens to me so often I wonder why I'm surprised any longer. Get my friend Sean to tell you about the guy outside the convention center in Milwuakee...