What Do You Do?

   Okay, pop quiz, hot shot. What do you do when:

You're in a store and you see a sign in Spanish, and even you can tell it's misspelled? Ignore it or say something?

You're talking to a friend of a friend and you find out he works as a cook at steak house. You also find out he's a vegetarian, so while he might know how to cook meat, he certainly doesn't care to do the job well, but nobody at the restaurant knows his dietary preference. Rat him out or keep the secret?

It's late at night and you're in Los Angeles proper, on Santa Monica between La Brea and Highland. You see a suspicious-looking character skateboarding down the sidewalk, jumping curbs and making a nuisance of himself. You also see him take a huge spill and grab his ankle like he's really hurt. Laugh and drive off or see if he needs help?

You and a few of your co-workers have a secret nickname for another co-worker, and not a flattering one, something like Muffin or Buttlicker or D-Bag. Someone mentions the name in passing in front of that person, who then wants in on the joke and asks who Muffin really is. Tell him the truth or pretend not to know what he's talking about?

While grocery shopping you see an actor you admire, one who you'd really like to speak to and - perhaps - get an autograph from. But she looks like a bag lady in old sweats, hair in a scarf, and battered gardening shoes, and clearly is in a hurry to get in, get what she needs, and get the hell out before anybody recognizes her. Go for the introduction or respect her privacy?

   Each one of these may or may not have happened to me. Can you guess what I might have done?