Sunk So Low

Everyone has things in their life that they're not proud of. Maybe you swept leaves onto your neighbor's lawn, maybe you drove in the carpool lane when you were by yourself, maybe you lied on your resume, maybe you shoplifted Reese's Peanut Butter Cups from the convenience store. Hell, maybe you robbed the convenience store for money to buy meth. Well, I myself have reached a new low.
   Last night, I watched fart videos on YouTube.
   It started out innocently enough, I was looking for clips of epee fencing (that's my sport, what I do for exercise). I went through a few of them, and then I saw this clip of farting dinosaurs available on the right-hand side. I'm not made of stone... come, on, it's dinosaurs farting. So I clicked, and that was the end of the fencing videos.
   An hour later and I still had not scratched the surface of farting videos available on YouTube. Dinosaurs, pigs, hippos, they all farted for my amusement. And the people - jeez, just try to STOP them from farting when there's a video camera around... impossible.
   I knew I had to quit watching, but every time I played one clip, there was another on the list I hadn't seen. I felt like a crack addict must, ashamed of myself but unable to stop the tragedy from unfolding. Finally I had to turn the computer off.
   I'd like to say I cried myself to sleep, but I can't. Some of those videos really are funny...