A Couple Extra Bucks

I've been thinking about ways to make a few extra buck under the table, enough to pay for gasoline or the water bill, whatever. It can't be too much money, or I'll attract undue attention from The Man, but it has to be enough to make the effort worthwhile. I've been thinking about it a while, coming up with ideas and then discarding them, until I hit on the perfect solution.
   I'll make moonshine.
   I'm not talking 'home brew' beer here, I'm talking rotgut, distilled corn mash, the kind of stuff that goes into ceramic jugs with 'xxx' on side. The kind of stuff hillbillies dream about, the kind of stuff Applachian bootleggers made small fortunes off of (and subsequently created NASCAR because of, it's true, look it up). Li'l Abner stuff, bare feet and squealing pigs and corncob pipes.
   The fact that I have absolutely no experience with any kind of brewing or distilling only ensures my success, beginners luck, as it were. It's time to take a trip to the hardware store, I need copper tubing, propane, that kind of thing. I don't really use my balcony for anything, it would make a perfect mini-distillery.
   I'm pretty sure I'd be the only moonshine operation in Pasadena, CA - at least I hope I'd be - so I'd get away with it longer than if I lived in, say, Little Rock, where no doubt they have a moonshine task force. My local authorities just won't be on the lookout for someone crafting white lightning. Although you never know, there could be thriving moonshine underground in Bungalow Heaven.
   This will also go a long way towards fulfilling my dream of being on COPS. I won't get away with it forever, you know.