Giving Hope

Since I'm still 'between assignments' I've been trying to think outside the box, career-wise. Trying to get out of the rut I've been in that clearly hasn't worked thus far and probably won't any time in the near future. After some consideration I think I've hit on a solution.
   I'm going to become a singer.
   Just to be clear, I cannot carry a tune, not even if you gave me a bucket and showed me how. I bring a bad name to 'tin ear' and 'tone deaf.' Dogs howl when I start humming and babies halfway around the world weep when I sing along to Skynyrd. Every man should know his limitations and one of mine is singing. Just can't do it. Which isn't going to stop me from making it my next career.
   See, I figure if I can make a go of it, if I can become the next Susan Boyle, then other people around the world will look at my accomplishment and say 'well, jeez, if that guy can be a singer, then I can < insert impossible task here >.' I'll be the low-bar that other people can aspire to leap. I'll be the black-sheep cousin who inexplicably made good and now shames all the other seemingly more-apt cousins. I'll be the guy that makes real singers, people with actual talent for that, tear their hair out and curse the heavens for the injustice of it all.
   Yeah... I'm all about the humanitarian stuff.