Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Ah, Look At All The Germy People

You know what I've noticed, being 'between assignments?' Aside from how empty the gym is at 2 PM, or how astonishingly bad daytime TV is, or how panhandlers just aren't 'in the zone' outside of morning and evening rush hours?
   I haven't been sick.
   I swear it's true, and knock wood to keep the streak going. You hear about studies of workplace illnesses, and about how the office is just one big, infected cesspool of viruses hopping from person to person. Well, it's true. I haven't been in an office in three months, and I haven't had one cold, not one sniffle, not one headache or sinus infection or sore throat. Not one.
   And it's not like I'm a hermit, either. As a matter of fact I've probably spent more time in the company of other people - and more people besides - in the past three months than I ever did when I was working. I just haven't contracted any illnesses from them.
   So if you're constantly sick at work, if you always have a stuffy nose or a chest cold that just won't seem to go away, the solution is clear. Quit. Put in your two weeks' notice and then get the hell out and get yourself better. Would you rather be healthy, or would you rather be oppressed by an unfeeling, uncaring, corporate leviathan? Your call.

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