Friday morning at 7 AM is the time I usually work out with my trainer, Steve. Normally I sleep in a little, but seeing as how I don't actually go into an office any longer today I had to wake up a little early. Bastards.
I noticed that there are many more people in the gym these days. Usually there's a spike in attendance around the New Year, people making resolutions they know they won't keep, but I think as the economy tanks more and more, people are taking advantage of the money they've already spent on gym memberships. Good for them, but they're taking up space and getting their sweat on the equipment I use. Bastards.
Gym Etiquette for Guys
Even though I go to the gym regularly I'm no gym rat, but there are a few guys in the gym I need to set straight. I'll start with worst offenders in the locker room, later I'll address those on the gym floor.
In the locker room:
Mr. Spread-Out
there are 100 lockers and four benches, but somehow this guy thinks he can take an entire bench for himself. Shove over, asswipe.
Mr. Walk-Around-Naked
I know it's the locker room, but for God's sake, put on some underwear. And please, please, please don't dry off your johnson under the electric hand dryer.
Senor Speedo
seen only in gyms with pools. This usually-European offender proudly presents his banana hammock, unaware of the cringing around him
Cologne Boy
usually a younger man, sometimes a much older man, this guy thinks smell-good replaces deodorant. If it's enough perfume to set off the smoke alarm, it's too much.
The Foot Powder Jackass
Who uses foot powder any more? Didn't that go out with pomade and spats? Not for this guy, who spreads a liberal helping of it all over the floor, usually right where you
put your stuff.
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So true! Just be grateful the men aren't wearing thongs with the banana sling in the front. "MY EYES!" I'm not a guy, but women do similar (and equally) irritating things. They have more items to spread around such as makeup, hairspray and "what the hell is that?" I try not to look. They walk around naked as well and dry breasts off with the electric dryer. Takes longer because there are two. Ha,Ha. They hog the mirror when all you are trying to do is make sure you don't have a booger on your face. Then they have the gall to ask...... DOES THIS MAKE MY BUTT LOOK FAT?
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